Dear Diary...

i heart Mike T.

this little gem was pretty much all that littered the pages of my first diary. (Although apparently I "playad" with aubrey a lot too.) It was awesome, shiny pink and purple cover with hearts all over it, multicolored lined pages and the best part-a pink sand filled see through heart sandwiched in the cover. awesome I tell you. (as soon as my camera has a battery and I get this picture business happening I'll post a picture, It's in the works, bear with me, and I'm sorry to make you use your imagination cause it's hard to explain the coolness of this diary) Mike T. in case your wondering was my second grade boyfriend. Oh yes, Mike Talaga, cutest boy in the class. He who coined the phrase "get out of my bathroom!" if you were synchronize swinging with him on the swings. what a bad boy. I, of course, was allowed to swing next to him- we were exclusive.(I'm no floozy.) This was the extent of our relationship...that and the occasional handholding (don't make eyecontact, don't make eyecontact, don't make eyecontact-let go and run away!) -le sigh. (anyways, the journal writing eventually morphed into mountains and mountains of food journals and calorie counts which is not nearly as fun as swings.) And on to my point, I think I need to just consider this my diary. I ultimately have to write this for me, and I suppose it's a good thing that I'm all spun up about writing things down again,but my journal writing, feelings wise, has been less than stellar in the past. (well, in second grade it was pretty good....) I guess I'm not really sure what I want to put out into the universe so I'm just going to try to be authentic and if you guys want to laugh at me along the way and give me a good kick in the ass when I'm sitting in my pee pants I can't wait. (gonna make like Ryan Reynolds in Just Friends-hug my snow globe, wear rental skates and "be myself". (man, that sounds so less gay when his mom sings it to him in the shed than when I write it down.) but- due to my constant need for approval and perfectionism tendencies i worry about who might read this and what I want to write, and this is only my second post! Is that normal? nevermind, I know about how normal I am.... in the middle of the night I'm thinking about what I want to write later, i hope that goes away. I enjoy sleep. I think I'm like a little kid with a sparkly new toy, I'm over stimulated with this blogging thing:) so i'm going to pretend it's just my diary, ie, what I heart and food journals:) I hope you all stick with me while I figure this picture bizz stuff out and get settled!:) (i ate a tangelo today that I so wanted to take a snapshot of-it a had a nipple on it like one of those african women with aureoles the size of frickin cds. damn you batteries, thank you tangelo for being yummy.)
pees and ques for today-did this happen to anyone else when they first started blogging? does it go away?

ps. I still kind of heart you Mike T.